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A Collection

When I was little I wanted very badly to have a collection.  I wanted something neat to bring in to Show and Tell.  I tried rocks, but all I could gather were the rocks in my backyard.  I tried buttons…but I only found about three loose in my house.  I thought about toys, but I shared everything with my sister.  Eventually I gave up.  I suppose the closest I ever got to a collection was my stock pile of stuffed animals.  The thing is; sometimes I still wish I had a collection of something.  I’m just older now to realize that I don’t collect anything.  I think it’s a waste of space.  I don’t want a bunch of weird nicknacks floating around gathering dust.  Truthfully, I have a bunch of pictures and a few mementos I have kept from certain times in my life, and except the pictures they all (for now) fit in a glass vase. Which is really what a collection is about anyway.  Taking time to gather these things that you feel are special.  Things you feel are worth having around.  That concept eluded me for a long time.  I wanted to have a whole collection at once.   Like buy fifty marbles and say, “This is my collection!”  I would have had junk.  Because not one of those marbles would have meant something to me.  Sometimes I feel that there might be something wrong with me because I don’t put sentiment into items.  I know plenty of people who have a collection of stuff that they will NOT let you throw out because it means the world to them.  I, on the other hand, could walk out of my house with a handful of items and not miss a thing left behind.  Lately I have been coming to terms with that, and realizing that there really is nothing wrong with me.  In some ways I feel I am better off sometimes.  If my place goes up in flames I won’t be devastated, just a little put off that my computer and tv (which cost a decent bit of cash) are gone.  I am imagining a best case scenario where my dog is safely at another house.  He is not an item, he is my friend.

So, I do have a small collection of things, but nothing I put my world into.  My world is the world.  My true collection is in my brain.  The people I love, the memories I have.  That is my true collection.

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